Funny Work Quotes

Funny Quotes About Work

Funny Quotes about Work to Get You through the Day: Sometimes, at work we need a bit of humor or a smile to relieve the stress and demands of the workplace. If you’re having a rough day at work, the following quotes will remind you that some quirky things about jobs are just universal and it’s helpful to know that you’re not the only one out there who’s experienced it. No matter what job you have, work life always comes with its stresses.

Let these 30 funny work quotes cheer you up and brighten your weekdays.

30 Funny Quotes About Work

  • “If you think your boss is stupid, remember: you wouldn’t have a job if he was any smarter.” — John Gotti
  • “It’s a shame that the only thing a man can do for eight hours a day is work. He can’t eat for eight hours; he can’t drink for eight hours; he can’t make love for eight hours. The only thing a man can do for eight hours is work.” — William Faulkner
  • “Most people work just hard enough not to get fired and get paid just enough money not to quit.” — George Carlin
  • “I used to work at McDonald’s making minimum wage. You know what that means? You know what your boss was trying to say? It’s like, ‘Hey if I could pay you less, I would, but it’s against the law.’” — Chris Rock
  • “Concentrate all your thoughts upon the work in hand. The sun’s rays do not burn until brought to a focus. “ — Alexander Graham Bell
  • “Either you run the day or the day runs you.” — Jim Rohn
  • “I’m a greater believer in luck, and I find the harder I work the more I have of it.” — Thomas Jefferson
  • “When we strive to become better than we are, everything around us becomes better too.” — Paulo Coelho
  • “Don’t judge each day by the harvest you reap but by the seeds that you plant.” — Robert Louis Stevenson
  • “Just one small positive thought in the morning can change your whole day.” — Dalai Lama
  • “Do the hard jobs first. The easy jobs will take care of themselves.” — Dale Carnegie
  • “Talent means nothing, while experience, acquired in humility and with hard work, means everything.” — Patrick Suskind
  • “Developing a good work ethic is key. Apply yourself at whatever you do, whether you’re a janitor or taking your first summer job because that work ethic will be reflected in everything you do in life.” — Tyler Perry
  • “A lot of fellows nowadays have a B.A., M.D., or Ph.D. Unfortunately, they don’t have a J.O.B.” — Fats Domino
  • “It’s just a job. Grass grows, birds fly, waves pound the sand. I beat people up.” — Muhammad Ali
  • “Time is an illusion. Lunchtime is doubly so.” — Douglas Adams
  • “If hard work is the key to success, most people would rather pick the lock.” — Claude McDonald
  • “The only thing that ever sat its way to success was a hen.” — Sarah Brown
  • “I like work; it fascinates me. I can sit and look at it for hours.” — Jerome K. Jerome
  • “A lot of people quit looking for work as soon as they find a job.” — Zig Ziglar
  • “When I was 16 I worked in a pet store, and they fired me because… they had three snakes, and one day I braided them.” — Steven Alexander Wright
  • “There’s no business like show business, but there are several businesses like accounting.​” — David Letterman
  • “Son, if you really want something in this life, you have to work for it. Now quiet! They’re about to announce the lottery numbers.​” — Homer Simpson
  • “When a man tells you that he got rich through hard work, ask him: ‘Whose?’” — Don Marquis
  • “The best way to appreciate your job is to imagine yourself without one.” — Oscar Wilde
  • “Doing nothing is very hard to do… you never know when you’re finished.” — Leslie Nielsen
  • “I choose a lazy person to do a hard job, because a lazy person will find an easy way to do it.” — Bill Gates
  • “No man goes before his time—unless the boss leaves early.” — Groucho Marx
  • “You don’t have to see the whole staircase, just take the first step.”
    — Martin Luther King, Jr.
  • “If you think your boss is stupid, remember: you wouldn’t have a job if he was any smarter.” — John Gotti
Funny Work Quotes